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Friday, April 16, 2010

SaD CasE

Thought today will be a colorful day which i can meet a friend for the first time after knowing each other for about 2 years plus... But then it turns out bad..

I don't know what happen to her, few days back she so confirmed with me that she will go out with me.. and don't know why, don't know how, at the very last moment she told me she don't want to go and asked me to forget about her ... i just treat her as a good friend as we always chat along last time ..

I cannot accept the last minute cancelation.. so i acted so stubbornly, msning her to meet me there at 7pm which i will be going soon.. and then i offline ~ i reached there about 6.40pm .. and waited at the entrance until 7.40pm .. I sense a big moment of loneliness as so many people had passed by me.. every faces, every action, every scene of people moving around me.. I am so stupid yet stubborn .. i know she will not come.. but then i still believe that she will..

I felt that the new me is such a screwed up person .. became a good boy deserve such things? Changing to a better life deserve to be ignored by others? Maybe my theory is correct, good boys got no good ending~ should i change back to my old kind?? I feel like shouting, screaming ~ ARGH !

At that moment of loneliness, i cried .. i actually cried infront of public.. get ignored by a person that i thought she will be a great friend .. but then .. ya .. i know .. i hate ignorance .. i hate to be ignored .. i hate IT !!! ..

After i felt better .. i went to my friend's restaurant .. the Mantra .. and ate there .. Because he is the manager there .. He actually treat me for about over RM40 .. Woe .. Thx my bro ~ thx for cheering me up .. .. during eating, at that moment i still hoping she will come and find me ~ but then i am so wrong .. i went away with disappointment .. then went to church .. I am such a jerk for doing such thing .. my 1st most stupid thing i had ever done in my life ~ ~ ~ Its all my fault ..

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